As some of you may know, aside from -Pop Up Video-, my favorite non fiction show is the interview program known as -Inside the Actor’s Studio-. (Yes, we can debate the “facts” on -Pop Up Video- as being true or not, but that is for another post.) -Inside the Actor’s Studio- is actually the culmination of a series of classes taken by aspiring artists working on graduate degrees in everything from script writing to stage acting. An established actor (or ensemble, as in the case of “The Cast of -The Simpsons-“) spends four hours or so being questioned by the Dean of The Actors Studio. Topics range from “What elementary school did you attend?” to “Why did you agree to be in that music video?” The four hour session is edited down to one (or two in the case of Robin Williams) and aired on the Bravo channel.
I have always wanted to be interviewed like that. I used to want to be on -This is Your Life- but a)It’s not on anymore (how many of you reading this even know what program I’m talking about?) and b) I don’t like surprises all that much. I mean, would I REALLY want my first grade teacher appearing in public to talk about what a brat I was? I don’t think so.
I do, however, love to talk about myself. I’m not a complete egocentric, but I am my favorite subject (Poor Toby Keith would have written “I Wanna Talk About ME” much earlier if I had been in his life). The chances of me being on national television (not a star, not famous, not the crime committing type-too scared of the police) are slim to none. But I do have this blog. And it is my birthday.
So (not that you asked) here are the answers to some of the questions asked on one of my favorite shows. Imagine me fidgiting around on a chair and someone at a table with a pile of blue cards in front of them.
WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
The short answer is that I was born in Alabama. The longer answer is that I was born in Decatur, Alabama. My parents were living in Moulton at the time and that is where I lived for my first two years.
WHAT WAS/IS YOUR FATHER’S NAME AND WHAT DID/DOES HE DO?
My father is Stephen Frederic Hall. The “Stephen” is where my “Stephanie” comes from. My dad has been a minister of all kinds of things (education, singles, youth, senior adults) but his main title is “Minister of Music”. Some churches call this position a “Choir Director” and some label it a “Worship Leader”. Daddy plans the hymns, arranges the solos, leads some of the small groups, teaches some of the Bible Study Classes, takes the Senior Adults on “Mystery Trips”, picks out the cantatas for Christmas and Easter and sometimes introduces special guests from other churches. He’s written his own songs and has dabbled in writing stories as well.
WHAT WAS/IS YOUR MOTHER’S NAME AND WHAT DOES/DID SHE DO?
My mother is Claudia Rose Estes Hall, from Dickson, Tennessee. (The “Rose” in “Stephanie Rose Hall Sims” is in honor of her. I love my name.)  Her degree is in kindergarten through eighth grade education, but she has mostly worked in preschool, kindergarten and first grade. She has supervised field trips, taught low functioning kids how to read and write (she is especially interested in early childhood reading), fallen in love with Disney characters while searching for “clean” movies and heroes to introduce her children to, shocked her classroom by appearing in places such as Wal*Mart and Pizza Hut (teachers don’t REALLY live behind their desks, you know), explored pumpkin patches and petting zoos, watched caterpillars become butterflies and sung “I’m gonna be a part of it/First Grade/FIRST GRADE!”.
WHAT ELEMENTARY SCHOOL (S) DID YOU ATTEND?
First I went to Caldwell. It was sort of down the street from us when we lived in Alabama. Across the street was a playground that, when I was little, I thought of as “mine”. I was apparently upset when fall rolled around, classes resumed and “my” playground was invaded by the big kids.
I don’t remember much about my academic life in Alabama. I know I met a dark haired, dark eyed beauty named Beth whom I now call “Beth From Alabama” who taught me “When I Survey The Wondrous Cross” in sign language. I learned to write in cursive and wanted to write “Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious” on everything. I also did a report on the state of Idaho, but I wouldn’t be able to tell you anything about it now.
After Alabama, we moved to Tennessee. We lived in Sweetwater and I attended Brown. At Brown, I learned such poems as “Stopping By Woods on a Snowy Evening” and passages from the Psalms. My friends and I acted out scenes from “The Three Investigators” on the playground. I believe I was someone named Bob since he had glasses. In a couple of classes, I was allowed to read some of my little stories out loud. My favorite was about Joan of Arc. I loved writing about Joan of Arc.
At one of the schools (I can’t remember which), I had a teacher who read us a chapter of the Bible and a chapter of a novel before class began. It was an introduction to Trixie Beldon and her friends which I couldn’t get enough of. Years later, when e-bay came around, I had Kenny get the Trixie Beldon books for me. I still have them on a shelf.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SIBLINGS?
I have a brother, Clayton Frederic Hall. I was three and a half when he was born (also in Decatur). I recommend that all ministers who might be moving from one church, one missionfield, to another have more than one child. Clay was the only kid I knew during my times of being “the new girl”. We bonded over songs we learned (“You Get A Line And I’ll Get A Pole, Honey” comes to mind), pop stars (Madonna was in her early stages at that time and there was that band who sang the word “Highway” over and over) and games (though he had much more patience with Monopoly than I ever will have). Clay was the outgoing one and I was content to let him do the talking. He was my buddy, my “Bubby”, my partner in crime and I was lucky enough to be along for the ride.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE WORD?
I don’t know if I have one, really. The ones I use the most are “Anyway…” and “Hey Babe?” The former is used when I want to return to a previous topic. The latter is when we’re at work and I want my husband/boss to do something for me or explain something to me.
WHAT ISÂ YOUR LEAST FAVORITE WORD?
I have two: The word is “later”. The phrase is “Let’s take a break”. To me, both mean “Whatever it is you want to do (or whatever it is that we are doing) we are about to stop/halt/never get back to/never start/leave unfinished.” Both of these raise my hackles instantly.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SMELL? (Note: This is not something that James Lipton asks, but he should.)
Apple Cinnamon, Mint Chocolate, Lemon Zest…but not all at once.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SOUND?
My cat purring. She’s usually up and investigating something (or jumping on counters that she shouldn’t be jumping on) so I love it when she sits in my lap and watches TV with me. I also like when my husband’s phone says “Droid” at random times. It always makes me laugh.
WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE SOUND?
Animals yelping in pain. Even if an animal is “the enemy” in a TV show or movie, when it yelps, I cry. This doesn’t, however, explain why I won’t read animal BOOKS. There are no sounds in those.
WHAT PROFESSION (OTHER THAN YOUR OWN) WOULD YOU LIKE TO TRY?
I have decided that my dream profession is to be the research assistant to a traveling professor. That way, I can see the world. I can learn interesting facts. I can be nosy. But I DON”T have to be responsible for compiling any of the facts.
I’d also like to be a professional doll. Not a doll like a toy. But someone who lets other people mess with her clothes, hair and make up. I like to be played with. I just don’t like to put anything together myself. Though I do like the color blue.
WHAT PROFESSION WOULD YOU NOT LIKE TO TRY?
I wouldn’t want to have anything to do with math. But what I would really not like was a job in which I was responsible for any important outcomes of people’s lives. I couldn’t be a doctor, for example. I couldn’t be a teacher. I couldn’t work in insurance. I couldn’t be a clown and be the reason little kids have nightmares. I couldn’t…well, you get the idea.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CURSEÂ WORD?
Well, besides that brief “Bad Bad Leroy Brown” period, I’ve mostly made up my own language of anger and frustration. When my husband half irks and half amuses me, I say “silly rabbit” (yes, I totally ripped that off of Twix). When I haven’t been at work in a while and someone has misfiled an invoice I say “Work with me, people” or “Come ON, you guys!”
When I was younger, I would say “Frudabaga!” And as children my brother and I would call each other “You Noun” because we had learned that it meant “Person, Place or Thing”.
But mostly I just hiss “Shoot Fire”, prompting whomever is nearest me to declare me “country”. Well, I’m part Alabama, part Tennessee, part Kentucky. I don’t reckon I have a choice.
IF HEAVEN EXISTS WHAT DO YOU WANT GOD TO SAY WHEN YOU REACH THE PEARLY GATES?
First of all, people, heaven is real. As is hell. God is love, but there IS a division as to where we will spend eternity.
As to what I hope God will say? Well, there is a song called “This One’s With Me” that expresses my thoughts on the subject perfectly.
Look it up. You’ll be glad you did.